Wild Coyotea

Herbal Alchemy Inspired by California

Ritual

Forgiveness Magic: Ritual for Healing

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My boyfriend and I recently started reading “Forgive for Good” by Dr. Fred Luskin.  I immediately recognized the important lessons, and knew that forgiving was good for my mind, body and spirit – but I was understanding those things mentally and not spiritually. Then I had a horrific nightmare about a friend who is no longer with us – and she wanted to kill me.  The day after the nightmare, and only a few chapters into “Forgive for Good,” I was meditating and all of a sudden I had a flood of faces and scenarios that showed up as long-standing grievances in my life. People and situations that I had felt betrayed by came flooding to the forefront and I realized that the forgiveness book was going to play much more intimately in my life. I had some major healing and forgiving to do.  I felt the hurt of betrayals, mostly from women who I had considered my friends, and knew that shoving those really uncomfortable feelings of sadness, shame, guilt, and innocence into the closet was not good for me.  I had to forgive, let go, face my fears, and move on as much as possible.  I know that I am not alone in my need for Forgiveness, so I created this ritual to share.  Be kind to yourself, be compassionate, open your heart and get the good healing.

 

PRE-RITUAL ENCOURAGEMENT: You may alter this in any way you please, change words or concepts to work for you.  If you have never done a healing ritual for yourself, you can just follow the “instructions” and follow your heart, you can’t go wrong.

 F O R G I V E N E S S    R I T U A L

 

Find a quiet space where you won’t be interrupted. Get comfortable in a seated position, whether that is on a yoga mat, on a comfy pillow, or even a chair or couch, whatever feels good to you.

 

Light a candle.  This represents the lightness of Love, the flame of the Heart, and Purity. 

 

Close your eyes and imagine a rod of light running from the crown of your head all the way down your spine to the earth.  Feel the energy of the earth coming up your spine.  Imagine yourself growing roots into the ground and acknowledge the earthy pulse of all that you are connected to.  You are supported.  Imagine that energy, or rod of light, going up through the bottom of your spine (root chakra, survival), up through your pelvis (sexuality and creativity), your core (power center), up to your heart (compassion), throat chakra (communication), third eye (intuition) and out the crown of your head (cosmic consciousness).  Imagine that rod of light going up into the stars, connecting you to the astral plane, to all that is.  Take as long as you need with this process until you feel grounded, centered and open-hearted. 

 

Start envisioning people or scenarios you have felt hurt by, or any sort of grievance that could heal with forgiveness. You can choose to only focus on one person or grievance, or many, it’s up to you.  Imagine the face of the person you felt hurt by, and while keeping your heart open, say to them (in your mind) whatever you need to feel as complete as possible in this moment. Keep it simple and kind.  Remember, you are forgiving for YOU, for YOUR HEALING. Acknowledge your part in the hurt or suffering. Offer as much forgiveness as you can to this person (remember, 10% forgiveness is more than 0%.  100% is incredibly awesome).  Forgive yourself for your role in the grievance.  Imagine the person in white and gold light and see your heart radiating love. 

 

Read the Following or SAY OUT LOUD for best results:

I am Protected.

I forgive Myself.

I forgive ________.

I stand in Love and ask (The Universe, God/dess, Hanuman, you choose) for the Blessing of Divine Forgiveness.

And So it Is. 

 

Light some palo santo or sage, blowing the smoke around the room and around yourself for cleansing and purity.  Blow out the candle, or let it burn if you remain in the room.  Thank yourself for taking time to Forgive.

 

Be good to yourself, forgiveness can be a process.  You can repeat this ritual as often as necessary to continue with a forgiveness practice.  If I get enough response from this ritual, maybe we can do a whole week of forgiveness magic!  Thank you for taking time to read and take care of yourself. Please share this link!

 

XO,

Califa Coyote


Cosmic Spring Moon - Ritual + Wisdom

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I follow the cycles of the moon and seasons.  Every 28 days, the moon shines her full brightness, then wanes until we have a dark moon, a New Moon, 14 days later. The New Moon of this Spring Equinox will wax full in two more weeks, continuing the natural lunar cycle.

While some folks look forward to Christmas or Easter, I grandly celebrate the seasons and the moon cycles.  It is a great time to remember the waxing and waning of our personal lives.  A New Moon's darkness is a great time to let go of anything from the past month, year, or lifetime, to be ready for the expansion of lunar and personal light.  

Not only is today the New Moon, it is also the beginning of Spring.  We have come through the darkest nights of winter, often hibernating (physically or spiritually), sometimes mimicking the darkness in our selves by becoming more reclusive, incubating new ideas that will be ready to sprout once Spring comes to town.  She is here!  It is a perfect time to reflect on the lessons of winter, and give yourself permission to step into a new chapter of growth and expansion.  NOW IS THE TIME.

A good friend and mentor, Shiloh Sophia, sent out a beautiful poetry practice this morning, inviting us to BE in the space of the New Moon Eclipse Equinox, and it inspired the following poem. To be inspired regularly by the wild, soulful, visionary artist and teacher (she just presented at the UN!), get in Shiloh's vibe.

 

Cosmic Spring Moon.

Comfort.

Chaos.

Ceremony.

Wildly vivid dream worlds.

Kissing, killing, searching.

Bright Green Growth.

Tender love, dancing renewed.

Lady Luna guiding and reminding,

Revolving through the darkness of Winter,

Into Spring’s fresh sweet brightness.

Eclipse giving us inevitable images

Of our own shadowy transformation.

No excuses, we must go forward now.

And so I shall accept All As Is.

And so I shall believe in the power of my own curving path.

And so I shall spring into my confident heart, stitching hearts and moons of gratitude

as I follow the sun’s bright trail,

Living out my delicate incarnation one earth day at a time. 

New Moon + Spring Ritual

Give yourself time to sit with a journal or piece of paper and pen.  Make a cup of tea or coffee or kombucha, whatever suits your fancy.  Light a candle to represent the Spring and forthcoming Light.  

Ask yourself these questions, and write freely.  Do not censor yourself.

  • What are you allowing yourself to let go of right now?

  • What seeds have you started sowing?

  • What darkness can you acknowledge and release?

  • What is the Light in your life? 

  • How are you transforming?

  • What are you dreaming of?

Once you have written freely, choose a new piece of paper and divide it into two columns: Darkness and Light. 

Write words or phrases on each side. For example, under darkness I wrote: self doubt, fear of failure, sadness. Light: love, partnership, creativity.  You can interpret darkness and light as you will.  Darkness is not necessarily "bad" nor light "good", they are just different parts of the same whole. Once you have filled this up, thank yourself for diving into this deeply personal process, and safely burn the paper.  You may burn it in a ceramic bowl, in a fireplace, or an outdoor fire pit.  Allow the Universe to work Magic.  If you feel brave enough to share about how this process was for you, please respond in the comments below, or email me wildcoyotea@gmail.com I love to hear about your own Moon + Spring Rituals. Be kind to yourself, this is a big time of transformation. Remember to sleep enough, eat nourishing foods, and stay hydrated.  Keep listening to your inner wisdom and follow your own unique path.

With Love + Respect,

Califa Coyote

Photo by the wildly talented Allison Pharmakis.

Life as Ritual

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The practice of ritual has been a constant in my life since I was a little girl.  At the breakfast table, my mom and sisters and I would recount our dreams every morning: discussing the lively, bizarre, enigmatic mysteries of our nightly escapades.  Sometimes we would help each other find deeper meanings, other times working them out ourselves as we attempted to explain these cryptic night puzzles to each other.  Sharing our dreams in the morning was a ritual we enjoyed, a blend of magical sharing, sisterhood and cereal. 

 

What is Ritual? How can it be defined?  Merriam Webster gives a few definitions: “always done in a particular situation and in the same way each time”, “done in accordance with social custom or normal protocol”, and “ the established form for a ceremony; specifically :  the order of words prescribed for a religious ceremony”.  There are more definitions to be found, but I would like to define Ritual for myself.  To me, Ritual is an act that is performed repeatedly, with reverence. 

 

I love living with the philosophy of “Life as Ritual”, which encompasses the daily acts of my life into reverential, sacred, meaningful endeavors.  Making tea is one of my favorite rituals. Boiling the water, placing the dried herbs in a teapot, waiting for them to steep, pouring the healing liquid into my favorite mug gives me peace and pleasure.  Another favorite ritual is playing with my tarot cards. I have quite a few decks. I love choosing one that calls to me, holding the cards, imagining a question or concept I’d like more information about, and giving reverence to the cards as I divine some new perspectives and answers while pulling cards.  Rolling and smoking my herbal smoking blend is another ritual that gives me deep satisfaction.  What if we could truly enjoy these little acts every day, instead of just going about life on autopilot, we gracefully give these rituals meaning and love, adding to the enjoyment of small deeds. 

 

Creating rituals for ourselves is very personal. I would not expect you to enjoy the same daily acts as I do! Riding your bike to work, taking the dog for a walk, writing in your journal, making food for your loved ones, are all daily acts that can be turned into rituals with a shift of perspective.  When we cut vegetables, imagine all the energy that has already been expended to get the veggies to your home, and then as you infuse them with love as you prepare a meal, the effects of this ritual ripple out as your family eats the nourishing meal and feels the love of your work.  Here are some ideas for creating rituals for yourself. Please add to this list, share with us, and stretch your imagination to consider what else could be added to your ritual acts.

 

  • Cooking for your loved ones
  • Writing in a journal
  • Making tea or coffee
  • Lighting and burning incense and candles
  • Breathing
  • Walking
  • Playing with tarot cards
  • Stretching your body
  • Making your art
  • Enjoying nourishing food
  • reating a sacred space or Altar (more on Altar Making coming soon!)

 

This is just a short list to get your imagination sparked.  Try creating rituals for yourself and see how the joy in your life increases! Create your life as Sacred, it already is.

 

With Love + Reverence,

Califa Coyote Weiss

 

 

Don't Hate the Haters

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Hate is an attitude, a feeling, an action of being. When you hate it consumes you more than other emotions. Try being hateful and simultaneously smiling at your sister. Or try being hateful and making a wonderful meal for people you love.  I believe energy is real, and if you are hateful, this hateful energy spreads into your whole life.  The hard thing is, when someone directs hate at you personally, the energy is so charged, it’s the easiest thing in the world to react and be as intense and hateful as the perpetrator.

 

Recently, I’ve had the opportunity to put this into practice – to not become a hater myself.  In one month, I had two different people attack me personally online, on Facebook.  The attacks were over-the-top accusations about my being in the world, from pointing out obvious things like my privilege, to much less sane claims, like I was a “bad witch”. The first time it happened was the day I was launching my online store.  Being a one woman show here, I was literally setting up my website, making sure my handmade products were ready to go, writing a letter announcing the launch, etc… And I get hit with this crap – on my homepage of Facebook, a semi-public space for my social network to see. I also received an array of private messages, supporting the allegations that had already been posted.

 

Initially, I knew it was something I couldn’t take personally, because – WTF, these things weren’t TRUE, and I needed to continue directing my energy toward more productive things. But in reality, I had a mini-meltdown, verging on anxiety attack, feeling fueled and burnt by this hate! I tried talking to the person reasonably, which didn’t really do much.  I decided to block the person and make it clear that I was not up for this kind of bullshit.  This is called self-preservation and boundaries. It is inevitable that someone is going to be displeased with me – I’m putting myself out there in the world, being as vulnerable as possible.  If I choose to hate right back, I’m falling prey to hateful manipulation. I’m not getting even by getting mad, I’m letting them win their game.

 

I recently became obsessed with Louis Theroux’s documentaries.  Although I had heard of them, I was shocked to see the Westboro Baptist Church’s relentless force of hate as they picket soldier’s funerals, yelling at people, “God Hates Fags!”  Their message is that, since the USA supports gay rights, the troops are fags, deserve to die, and will burn eternally in hell – along with the rest of the world who isn’t part of their church (some 75 people).  Watching the story of their congregation unfold, their beliefs were completely unreasonable to me.  The children go to public school, where they have no friends, and the whole church has been alienated from the community and world at large because of their outrageously hateful messages.  Louis points out at one point that, because they are putting out so much hate into the world, they are insulating themselves with hate, of course all they see in the world is hate.  If you have one shred of compassion for humanity, you could easily fall into the trap of abhorring “The Most Hated Family in America”.  And all this will do is continue the cycle.

 

There is an appropriate place for anger – which can feel like hate, a fiery emotion, explosive, maybe even violent.  However, falling into the trap of hate, directing that toward anyone rather than solving it within yourself, allows you to be controlled.  Personally, I have found a few things that work to diffuse anger. 

·      Writing in my journal

·      Going for a run, or otherwise expending physical energy

·      Being outside

·      Talking to a trusted friend

·      Focusing on the breath

 

It is not wrong to feel extreme emotions, just be aware of them so they don’t control you, so you don’t become a victim of hate.  There are many reasons to get pulled into a negative spiral if you look around – international news, racist acts in the community, environmental destruction – but if we stay in that negative pattern we won’t be able to get the momentum to do something truly productive, contributing to the healing of hate.  Here’s to responsible emotional awareness, raising our vibration together, not hating the haters.

Peace + Love,

Califa

Winter Ritual

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Winter is time for…

Hibernation, internal processing, incubation, sleep, dreams, appreciating the darkness, staying warm, recognizing the force of the seasons.

I spent the last four years in Los Angeles and I didn’t experience much of the “seasons”, so I’m thankful to be in Northern California where it rains for weeks on end, and a wood-burning fire serves a true purpose.

Today is the first day of winter and I rose before the sunrise to welcome back the light. After the darkest night of the year, the days slowly start to elongate for the next six months.  Even as we enter the coldness of winter, the days become longer.  I love recognizing the force of the seasons- even if we don’t live somewhere that snow falls, our bodies recognize a change in pace, a feeling, a rhythm of winter.  Before spring comes, we have time to snuggle up, take a deep look inside, and see what seeds we want to plant and nurture.

If you’re wondering what to nourish this season, I encourage you to create a space for yourself to reflect and explore.  As the year ends and the business of the holidays have many of us bustling between work, parties, and family obligations, it’s essential to take time for ourselves to cultivate a place of personal intentions. This is not about creating a grand list of overwhelming “resolutions”, but rather feeling into what it is that actually supports you in your life, what it is that allows you to feel creative, alive, sustained.

Wintertime Ritual:

In a quiet place, light a candle and make yourself some tea, coffee, or a favorite warm drink.  I recommend writing on paper, but if you prefer a computer (or typewriter, like my sister), go ahead and use the tools you prefer.  Ruminate on the following questions:

·      How am I feeling right now? (free write, as much as you’d like, without judgment, just let it out onto paper. This is not to share or publish, it’s a catharsis and safe place for you to just let go)

·      What can I do to take care of myself in the coming winter months?  Without using “shoulds”, take note of what it is that you feel good doing, what it is that nourishes you.  It could be long walks in the forest, on the beach, a long bath, a bike ride,  a silent meditation, writing in your journal, connecting with loved ones, making home cooked meals, etc. Allow yourself to be fully immersed in the feel-good aspect of this exercise.

·      From a place of possibility, imagine what you could nourish and create, beyond your Self, this winter. Maybe it’s cultivating a writing practice, finishing a business plan, cleaning out the garage, continuing with an art project or something left in the dust.  Whatever it is, you feel some sort of call or inspiration toward this, not just a “should”. It may not feel easy, but you know that it’s something you truly want to do. 

·      If you need support with this project, write down what that is.  Maybe it’s making time once a week, or asking a neighbor to borrow their tractor, or getting a group of friends together for a craft night.  Whatever support you need, acknowledge it, write it down, and know that it’s possible.

·      Last but not least, acknowledge yourself and the real commitment you have made to nourish yourself this season.  You are capable, creative, and responsible for your influence on your own life.

Enjoy the coming months. It’s ok to stay inside, turn down dinner invitations, go to bed early.  Get plenty of rest. Let me know how the ritual goes for you, and adapt as you feel inspired.

Winter Blessings and Self Care Sanctifications!

Love,

Califa